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Lately, their activities had been limited to playing cards a few times a week.One day when playing cards, one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me.• The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run. • I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave." The old farmer replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim or make you get out of the pond naked.Pet Parrot A man buys a pet parrot and brings him home. I only came down to feed the alligator." Moral: Old age and treachery will always triumph over youth and skill.She then replies, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door." Quiz: How Old Are You Really? 0 - 5 = You're still young 6 - 10 = You are getting older 11 - 15 = Don't tell your age 16 - 25 = You're older than you think!From the following list of 25 items, count all the ones that you remember -- not the ones you were told about! Be sure to pass this along -- especially to all your friends with really good memories.

I'm walking arounf unprotected." The customer commiserated with her, but then added, "I haven't taken my Prozac today—everyone's walking around unprotected." Oh, the pity of old age. She rubs my back every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee." I said, "Well, then why are you crying?

• In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole. So one evening he decided to go down and see how things were holding up.

• I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident. "I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Much to his surprise, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

I know we've been friends a long time, but I just can't think of your name. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her.

For at least three minutes she just stared and glared. " Hard of Hearing Morris, an 82-year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.

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But the parrot starts insulting him and gets really nasty, so the man picks up the parrot and tosses him into the freezer to teach him a lesson. Wrong Color Suit An old lady was very upset as her husband Albert had just passed away. Through her tears she explained that she was upset because her dearest Albert was wearing a black suit, and it was his fervent wish to be buried in a blue suit.

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